Wednesday, October 31, 2007

More lovely girls

Thanks to a post over on Baino's Banter, I've just been reminded of my occasional series in male drooling that is the 'Lovely Girls' column. It's been all of 8 months since a global starlet was elevated in this doughty pantheon and had the laurels of loveliness bestowed upon her. The Moo-Dog conclave has been in session and I'm now pleased to reveal the identity of lovely girl number four.

Step forward, Amy Winehouse.

Yeah right, do you think I'm fucking blind as well as stupid?

No, the real recipient is Angelina Jolie. Now I know it's a controversial choice because she's mad as a box of ferrets, cuts herself, was a little bit too close to her brother, disrespects her venerable old Daddy John Voight, had a mad marriage to nutter Billy Bob, adopts kids and gives them stupid names and she stole Brad off poor Jennifer. She also seems to be experimenting with fad diets lately, such as the 'no-food' diet and 'don't eat' diet and so on. However, the Lovely Girls jurors (i.e. me) are all equal opportunities perverts and there's nothing that the perfect combination of smile, bum, boobs and lips cannot over rule.

Career-wise, I'm not too sure if she's done anything of note to be honest besides stand about looking lovely, but you know, sometimes that's enough to be a Lovely Girl. Gaming geeks will of course remember her starring as Lara Croft in Tomb Raider, some sort of archaeologist or other who wore shorts and a tee shirt so tight they'd give give you a deep vein thrombosis just looking at them. She also played some sort of loony lesbian model in a film called Gia, whose plot I have no recollection of save for the loony lesbian bits and isn't it funny the parts that stay with you ha ha ahem cough cough.

Her most recent flick, A Mighty Heart, saw her take a turn for the serious. She played a journalist whose husband is kidnapped by a bunch of bad hoors out in Pakistan and the film follows her efforts to get him back. It was dark stuff, and as I feared going in to the cinema, somewhat low on laughs and comedic content, but very good overall and sure you never get slapstick in these hostage dramas any more. And of course Angelina came through all the painful harrowing scenes with her loveliness still intact despite the sweaty environment, flies, and her crazy-looking bubble perm. Nice French accent too, yum.

I just wish she'd eat a few bags of chips now and again to get her curves back. Not that if she came knocking - and she's certain to be in touch once the Hollywood grapevine informs her that she's made the Lovely Girls here on Moo-Dog - I'd be in a position to turn her away or anything. Oh no, you see I'm not exactly beating the ladies off. On holidays last year for instance, I went to kiss the Blarney Stone and it told me to fuck off. True story.

15 moos and woofs:

Paul Heron said...

Feel free to call me a cynic or something but surely a photo of her from Gia ;-) would have been more 'appropriate' for reference purposes !!!

Terence McDanger said...

I thought of that Paul alright but I wanted people to read the post and not dissolve in their own drool in front of the screen.

Besides, it's a family blog as evidenced by the fact that I only use cuss words like fuck and bollocks and never c*nt. Except for there.

arun said...

gud anna amachi kalakki

Anonymous said...

When one see such lovely girls it is like: "there is still hope for the world"! However there is a fair number of the fair ladies who need to eat a little more, the bony looking frames of some girls look unhealthy, and in the final analysis it is the whole package (genetically judged) that is found attractive, so girls, forget the skinny look!

Hot Girls said...

Real Cut and Lovely

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