Friday, November 16, 2007

Don't click me, blogrush is shite!


I've had the 'blogrush widget' on my site for a while now and I feel the need to report on its effectiveness.

My articles have been 'syndicated' about 10,000 times and how many people do you think have clicked through? A few hundred? No. A few thousand? Nope, not even close. Give up? I'll tell you how many. Feckin' none. Zero. Squat. That's 25% of sweet fiddledy fuck, which is, as we know, a quarter of sweet fiddledy fuck which is, like, nothing. I think.

Anyway, what a load of arse it turned out to be. I pasted in that code after the stringent approval process lasting, phew, at least 15 minutes, and sat back awaiting the flood of traffic. I'd have it all, world domination, untold riches and yes, why not, a few phone numbers from sexy, nubile soap opera-loving virgins who felt compelled to offer their cherries to me after reading the laugh riot that was my appreciation of Sally Fletcher. Huh. Even an email from some old boiler pretending to be Heidi Klum would have been something.

But no. Not so much as a twitch on the wire. So now, I take my revenge and post this article in the hope that very soon, blogrush will festoon thousands of blogs with a headline proudly proclaiming themselves to be worse than useless.

And who in their right mind thought up the name 'blogrush widget' anyway? It sounds like something you stuff up your arse when you've a dose of the shkitters or something.

Hrrrmmmpph. I'm in just dandy form today altogether.

18 moos and woofs:

Paul Heron said...

Dude, it must be just you, I've been inundated with phone numbers from fresh nubile virgins....

.... No wait that was just a dream I had (Karien I know you like to check out this blog from time to time, so honey please disregard my comment!!!)

Seriously, Blogrush ain't the best, I've only had 7 'hits' from 10,000s of syndications.

To be fair the placement of the widgets on peoples websites will directly impact click through rates.

BUT even a perfectly placed widget (top left corner of any webpage) will only garner a tiny share of hits (in the region of about 2%).

I don't know if you use statcounter or google analytics, but you'll find that you also get very very few hits from the likes of blogarama etc so you would be better off moving all those little icons further down your page and move your archives further up (you'll get more hits from people staying on your website which leads to more referrals (via word of mouth)).

Most of your articles are pretty darn cool, and deserve a lot more exposure.

Your archives are hidden but I think you'll find that by placing it above your blogroll it'll prove quite beneficial for you (I've done 100s of tests with placements on my blog to see what works and what doesn't and placement is everything)

Terence McDanger said...

Paul Heron's Feng Shui for blogs, in shops this Christmas:-)

Cheers dude!

Jessica said...

I think theres a very real problem with your blogrushing fellas. You need greater editorial control.
I clicked on one such link from moodogs site which was titled "Is Santas Ho ho ho offensive to women".
Of course it is, the emotional drama we go through every year being called 'hoes'.
We shouldnt be exposed to such drivel on the internet also !

Terence McDanger said...

What's wrong with being named after a handy gardening implement? Not very complimentary I grant you but I've been called worse, such as flea-infested smelly shitebag for instance. And that was from my Mum.

Susan said...

You're right, "Blogrush" does sound more like something infectious, than a marketing tool.

And Paul is right too: let your content speak for itself. Your blog is a bright spot in my day, because it's clever, funny, and well-written, even when you're being grumpy.

Make that, 'especially' when you're being grumpy. And so, on to Grandad's...

Terence McDanger said...

Aw shucks. Thanks Susan.

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