Friday, August 15, 2008

Get ready Malta, I'm almost there

Wheeeeeeeeee! I'm off on me jollies!

All I have to do now is get a camera that works and iron a few creasy bits and bobs, oh, and finish packing and stuff, and then it's up into the clouds and away, those same clouds I'll leave hovering in their fixed position over the saturated rock known as Ireland for ten glorious days. I literally can't get out of this shithole quick enough.

I'm fully prepped. I have done a reckoning on essentials such as underwear, teeshirts and socks, and I reckon I have enough to see out the trip although, to be blunt about it, I expect it'll be a sweaty old time and consumption could rise beyond projected levels. I have powdered quick lime with me for daubing under my oxters should things get out of hand but I still expect to be drinking alot of water during the day to keep myself in a state of hydration.
Hey, I've even got my back de-furred - very metro I know - because I thought the Maltese will have enough to deal with when I get my hairy legs out, showing them the hairy shoulders as well might be too much.

I'm VERY excited. I hear Malta is very sunny and hot (33 degrees over there now like, not a cloud in the sky and that's all it's giving for the week. Maltese meteorologists, handy job wha?), the food is decent, the people are friendly, they don't use silly electric plugs thanksbetajasus, there's piles of history attached to the place (Knights of Malta, built some cool shit) you can boat trip it around to other islands, and you'll be falling across museums and megalithic structures and old temples too which sounds great to me as long as I don't get trapped in some passage chamber or other. It was the most bombed place in WWII as well I think, so there's lots of stuff to see relating to all that and for a bit of a buff like me, that amounts to fun.

But what I look forward to most of all? It's just going to be really nice waking up every day and not taking a tentative peek out the window to see if your car is floating off down the driveway, while Dorothy and Toto tumble flailing through the air not far behind. How great will it be to sit at a cafe and look out into the harbour after a pleasant Mediterranean meal, relax with a cool beer in my hand and the sun on my face as I plot my next move. It'll be nice to be somewhere where summer is a reality and not something that happens once a decade.

Sigh, it's all ahead of me, as Dolly Parton would say.

Oh, for those of you that worry, I will, of course, remember to apply a liberal coating of factor 50 with a paintbrush and bucket every morning. And I will try and update the blog a few times as well, maybe with a few photos if I get the aforementioned camera.

Now, just look after the rain till I get back. Nyahahahhahaha!

13 moos and woofs:

Susan said...

YAY! So what time will you be here to pick me up?

Are you serious about being a WWII buff? I'm the same, probably from being a veteran's daughter: my father's 1946 honorable discharge papers are framed on my wall.

Have fun; enjoy the sunshine; don't blind the natives with your Irishly-white flesh; don't spend all your money in the first pub; don't fall down a cliff, and don't drown in the hotel pool.

Worried about ya? nnnnnnnaAAAAHHHH...

Terence McDanger said...

Well by buff, I mean more than a passing interest. I tend to watch too mnay WWII documentaries on the History Channel, wacthed all of the World at War DVDs inside a week and rewatch Band of Brothers every six-eight months so I guess I'm kinda into it a bit.

I'll swing by about six-ish, k?

Dot-Com said...

Sun and heat... I almost remember what it feels like *grin* Not to worry though, we'll make sure the rain is still here when you get back! I'm sure you'll miss the excitement of swimming in the streets... suppose the hotel swimming pool will be an acceptable substitute?

Terence McDanger said...

Neither dot-com, I am not a swimmer. I paddle a bit like and stand on the shore looking about at it and stuff but that's about it.

Baino said...

*insert smug remark about living in Australia and temperatures in winter being the same as Ireland's summer but sunny*

Bon voyage you hirsuite holidaymaker, looking forward to the pics!

Adullamite said...

Sun? I remember reading about that.
Enjoy, and as you know Malta was awarded the George Cross during the war after the pounding it took. Had it fallen the war may actually have been lost would you believe!

Sounds a great place for you. I expect you will be coming back?

Kath Lockett said...

Have a good one, T McD. See if you can find a local lapdancer there, to compare the Maltese Mammaries with your recent Liverpudlian Laugh in.

Susan said...


Six o'clock what DAY?

Well, if you want serious gloating inspiration, just read my blog entry for the 16th, in which the western end of your home county has sunk completely under the waves.

You know, when the whole island goes under, the earth only has seven years left until The End. Saint Patrick said that. Or Saint Malachy. Or someone.

I'm just saying, that when you come to pick me up, you might need the Moo-Dog-Dinghy.

English Mum said...

Have fun. Be good. Don't talk to strangers, use your sunblock and don't forget to hand your room key in to reception.


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