Wednesday, September 09, 2009

McDanger reforms!

Well why not? Everyone's reforming. If it's good enough for The Spice Girls, Boyzone and Take That, then it's good enough for me. They're all at it these days. It is truly the age of the reformation my friends, get on board or get left behind. Don't mind Oasis like - sure, they've flipped the logic and have split up, but it's just so they can wait a few years and then reform; having lived the dying dream and witnessed the public outpouring at their own funeral as it were, they can then bask in the glow of a triumphal return.

So yeah, fuck it. I'm getting back together too. Truth is, I should never have split up really. I just thought I needed a break, recharge the batteries. I wanted to take time out to enjoy my garden, watch my kids grow and all that but after four months away I realised this was foolish, principally because I don't actually have a garden, or kids either. I tried watching the neighbours' instead but they reported me, which was a bit of a hair-trigger reaction on their part although in hindsight, it was two in the afternoon and I had forgotten to put on any trousers.

But I digress. Yes, I've decided to make a comeback. It's time to dust down my outrageous old outfits, the lurid wigs and lyrca one-piece and just get back out there. I've had a tingle in my fingertips for weeks now, you know - a bloggy feelin', came oe'r me stealing, if you will.
I guess I knew it was really time when I overheard two women talking in a cafe about some big business mogul friend of theirs who had made it big in plastics or something. They didn't say his name but I was sitting there praying and hoping and praying and just dying for them to say his name was Willie, just so I could grin at the person I was eating with and wonder aloud did they know him locally as 'Big Plastic Willy'.  Round their parts, like.

This type of stupidity was very familiar to me, like an old friend. Old dormant synapses started to spark again. I started wondering about the blog regulars. I bumped into one on a night out, he spoke about being out drinking with some bloggy pals. I suddenly missed it all. I realised it had been too long. I resolved to fire up the blog-mobile and take her back on the road. I'll know where I'm taking this when I get there sort of thing.  

Well, sigh, ok, I'll level with you. I haven't reappeared like this, just so I can make comedy allusions to possible dildo magnates. (Although this will be a central plank of the strategy going forward, rest assured). The real reason why? Well it always comes down to money doesn't it? Yep. I need the cash. You see, I've joined the ranks of the unemployed - sort of voluntarily in the end, as it turned out, although at the least they could have cried and formed a human barricade at the door or something, the bastards - so I'm now at a loose end. And there's nowhere better for my loose end than the internet, I always say.

Now I haven't been idling for the sake of idleness. During my time away from this crazy heady stage, I've been keeping busy. Immediately after a helter-skelter summer's work (my last as it would turn out, oh woe oh woe...) I pitched myself headlong into an intensive four-week course in Teaching English as a Foreign Language and having just completed it, I am now thinking global in terms of the workplace. The course completely disassembled everything I thought I always knew but had merely forgotten about my first language, and although I put it back together again fairly well, I have that uneasy feeling I get after manfully replacing the battery in my watch (all on my own!) and yet still have a few perplexing spare parts left over. Two of which are, rather ironically, batteries. Seriously though, there's bits of grammar and relative pronouns lurking in corners all over the place, but nevertheless my management and I are giving serious consideration to a year-long tour of Asia, possibly Korea.

We both feel that I need to branch out and break new markets. Korea's got Seoul and looks as likely and as blithely unsuspecting a place as any, but China, Japan, Hong Kong and Taiwan are also in the running. Heck, anywhere that's not Ireland stands a good chance of having me indoctrinate their youth with my own particular brand of English. I'm being that choosy. Sure it'll be a bit of craic like.

Besides, I want to go somewhere where I can write a more interesting class of blog. Anyone who still checks this page deserves that at the very least.

26 moos and woofs:

Baino said...

Good to see you back! I have another blogger who's actually already 'booked' to teach in Korea. I can put you in touch if you like. She's in Ballybloodysomewhere but has already accepted a position there. But I'm warning you, if you like your tucker, Korean food is bloody HOT!

Radge said...

He won't like the hot stuff, Baino.

As for you, Terence, I can't believe you're back without my having to write a 300 word essay about how you'd shacked up with that yoke from Abba - y'know, Bjorn - and that blogging was the farthest thing from your mind.

I have no idea what I'm on about. It's 7 in the morning for fuck's sake.

No, you shut up.

Grow Up said...

Remember in Korea you have to chew the freshly removed octopus tentacles, otherwise they are still active and can attach their suckers to your throat on the way down, resulting in choking.

Good to hear from you.

Terence McDanger said...

Cheers Baino. When I was a lost sheep in the wilderness, you were the only one who came looking for me. Beh!
I'm from Ballybloodysomewhere as well actually, I probably know that pal of yours. I'm a bit away from launch day but maybe I'll look her up later!

No Radge, you hang up. No you hang up. And it was the dodgy one from Sheakespeare Sister, ABBA were busy. Possibly, ahem, reforming...

Howya GrowUp, a mate did the whole Korea thing and I saw a picture of him with aforementioned blue and yellow little octopus on the end of his chopsticks. I'll be living in Burger King.

Susan at Stony River said...

WEST.
VIRGINIA.
Free house to stay in (if you get there before I sell our Cavan homestead).
You can teach the immigrants the language, or do whatever, there are jobs there, and you can drive to near anywhere in the US from there, cheap petrol. Cheap milk and bananas and everything else too. If you find you don't like it, hell, you're halfway to Asia from there and off you go.

NOT that I'm talking to you after such a long absence. As IF!

Hmph.

Terence McDanger said...

My comeback is complete. Susan has commented, or indeed, hath spoken.

I'm off for another four months now. Ta-ta!

Kitty Cat said...

Hey you're back, look at ya there! My blog reading list is McDanger-free no more. Hoorah and such.

hope said...

No, you don't get to leave the room until I verbally have a go at you too...after all, Susan and I spent precious time worrying about you and wondering, if in your absence, the poor cows were even being fed.

Okay, I'm feeling calmer now. No, I will not admit in pubic that I missed your caustic wit and banter. That might go to your head and you'd float off for another few months.

Glad you're back...and if you behave [well, do what you can] perhaps Susan will kidnap you and bring you to America for the holidays. Hey Susan, perhaps the Moo Man could be employed as your manservant until he decides where he wants to teach English. I'd buy a ticket just to see him converse with the folks in your WV neighborhood. ;)

Susan at Stony River said...

I DID NOT WORRY ABOUT HIM.

Hell, I'm not even talking to him.

Hmph.

But yeah, him on a Southern front porch with a glass of sweet tea would be something to see ROFL.

Terence McDanger said...

Hey Kitty Cat! It's me alright. Thanks for the welcome back. I hope to stick around a while now.

@hope: you were worried about me? Awwww bless. I was worried about me too truth be told but I stayed strong and pulled through.
I'm much intrigued by this offer of a West Virginian adventure. I get the impression you gals are setting me up for all sorts of getting chased around backwoods by gap-toothed hunters spitting chewing tobacco and stuff. Just for the laugh of it like.

@Susan: Ah give it up now, you know you can't stay mad at ole Terence. Sure I saw those landslides in Taiwan and I thought fondly of you up in West Cavan straight away.
And your offer of a roof and sweet tea (and a Porsche!) is very kind I must say...aside from whatever you and hope are imagining happening to me over there.

The Man at the Pub said...

People that check this blog regularly deserve no such thing.

Indonesia is an interesting place. Sumatra is very spectacular, and is 'home' to many British Islefolk who, for some unknown reason, don't really want to go home.

Radge said...

I might just come along. You'll need an aleing partner.

Red Leeroy said...

Thank goodness. I had read that Bullets from Barca post 198 times. Phew. Welcome home.

Terence McDanger said...

It's TMATP! And Leeroy! All the old faces are filtering in one by one. Honest to God, it's like being at my own wake only I'm not dead and can relax and enjoy it.

Yes TMATP, I've looked into Indonesia as well. I've looked into Mongolia, Vietnam, Cambodia, Trinidad and Tobago, you name it, I've investigated its TEFL potential. What do you think I've been doing all these months?

I hear you Radge. We've been spectacularly shoddy at aleing lately - it's not you darling, it's me - but we will put this to rights next week.

NaRocRoc said...

It's alive. And kicking.

I'm reminded of that KitKat ad with Elvis... "I'm not dead baby I'm just takin a break". Except in real, blog form.

Kath Lockett said...

I can't believe I'm saying this, but what about AUSTRALIA?

Good to see you're back, Terence - I thought you'd stayed in Barca, trying to track down the naked guys you'd photographed!

Terence McDanger said...

Thangyouverymush, Na Roc Roc. N' Roll. Uh-huh.

Kath, any jobs going down there though? And thanks for the reminder on ole' snake willy himself, I really should post a photo, it's quite the marvel.

ninest123 Ninest said...

ninest123 07.23
replica watches, oakley sunglasses, burberry, oakley sunglasses, michael kors outlet, coach factory outlet, nike free, louboutin outlet, ray ban sunglasses, ray ban sunglasses, kate spade handbags, longchamp outlet, kate spade outlet, tiffany and co, prada outlet, michael kors, tiffany jewelry, tory burch outlet, michael kors outlet, chanel handbags, nike outlet, louboutin, coach outlet, jordan shoes, prada handbags, michael kors outlet, coach outlet, longchamp outlet, polo ralph lauren outlet, louboutin shoes, michael kors outlet, christian louboutin outlet, longchamp, michael kors outlet, nike air max, burberry outlet online, nike air max, oakley sunglasses, gucci outlet, polo ralph lauren outlet

ninest123 Ninest said...

timberland, michael kors, north face, sac longchamp, air force, true religion jeans, true religion jeans, hollister pas cher, louboutin pas cher, longchamp pas cher, nike air max, new balance pas cher, coach purses, lululemon, air jordan pas cher, nike roshe run, vans pas cher, ray ban uk, air max, true religion outlet, hollister, nike blazer, hermes, michael kors, michael kors, mulberry, lacoste pas cher, north face, sac guess, tn pas cher, vanessa bruno, ralph lauren uk, nike free, oakley pas cher, burberry, ralph lauren pas cher, true religion jeans, ray ban pas cher, converse pas cher, hogan

ninest123 Ninest said...

ferragamo shoes, reebok shoes, soccer shoes, mont blanc, babyliss, asics running shoes, chi flat iron, p90x workout, valentino shoes, north face outlet, vans shoes, lululemon, nike huarache, longchamp, nike air max, new balance, herve leger, mac cosmetics, mcm handbags, nike trainers, celine handbags, abercrombie and fitch, insanity workout, ghd, beats by dre, wedding dresses, nike free run uk, nike roshe, nfl jerseys, abercrombie and fitch, soccer jerseys, birkin bag, bottega veneta, instyler, north face outlet, nike roshe, giuseppe zanotti, hollister, jimmy choo shoes, nike air max

ninest123 Ninest said...

replica watches, thomas sabo, louboutin, montre pas cher, juicy couture outlet, coach outlet, supra shoes, vans, juicy couture outlet, toms shoes, hollister, gucci, timberland boots, nike air max, pandora charms, ralph lauren, oakley, ray ban, swarovski, nike air max, marc jacobs, pandora charms, links of london, hollister, converse outlet, swarovski crystal, iphone 6 cases, karen millen, hollister, pandora jewelry, wedding dresses, baseball bats, converse, lancel
ninest123 07.23

chenlina said...

chenlina230151202
michael kors outlet
coach outlet online
ray ban sunglasses
ugg boots
mulberry handbags
louis vuitton outlet
louis vuitton handbags
louis vuitton outlet
uggs on sale
mont blanc legend
uggs on sale
ugg australia
cheap uggs
canada goose outlet
michael kors bag
canada goose jackets
coach factory outlet
louboutin pas cher
michael kors outlet
oakley sunglasses cheap
toms outlet
toms shoes
louis vuitton bags
ugg boots
louis vuitton handbags
toms shoes
cheap jordans
burberry outlet
uggs on sale
nike huarache shoes
soccer shoes
prada handbags
hollister uk
louis vuitton outlet
north face jackets
tod's shoes
north face outlet
tory burch outlet
ralph lauren outlet
uggs boots
as

chenlili said...

2016-4-30 xiaobao
louis vuitton handbags
nike uk
vans shoes
tiffany and co
louis vuitton handbags
louis vuitton outlet
coach outlet
lebron james shoes
beats headphones
michael kors handbags
michael kors outlet
abercrombie
kate spade
ed hardy clothing
nike trainers
michael kors outlet online
michael kors handbags
louis vuitton bags
oakley sunglasses wholesale
designer handbags
ray-ban sunglasses
michael kors outlet
louis vuitton handbags
ugg boots
ray ban sunglasses outlet
michael kors outlet clearance
ray ban wayfarer
coach factory outlet
burberry outlet online
coach outlet online
ray ban sunglasses
nike uk
louis vuitton outlet
coach outlet
michael kors outlet online
nike huarache shoes
air jordan 13
michael kors handbags
nike factory outlet
tods outlet

chenlili said...

cheap jordans
mbt shoes clearance
michael kors outlet
ugg boots uk
polo ralph lauren outlet
fitflop sandals
ray ban sunglasses
uggs for men
louis vuitton factory outlet clearance
ugg sale
oakley sunglasses
michael kors outlet
louis vuitton outlet
cheap ray ban sunglasses
michael kors outlet
ugg boots uk
michael kors outlet
ugg slippers
christian louboutin shoes
nhl jerseys
kate spade handbags
michael kors handbags
coach factory outlet
canada goose sale
uggs outlet
louis vuitton handbags
coach outlet
red bottoms
louis vuitton outlet
ugg boots
adidas shoes
adidas shoes
canada goose outlet
ray ban sunglasses outlet
ugg boots uk
longchamp outlet
washington wizards jerseys
cheap jordans
chenlili20160912

Liu Liu said...

The Giants will lean on rookie Andre Williams for at least Nike Air Max 90 one more week in New York's backfield.


Ralph Vacchiano of the New York Daily News reported Saturday that Rashad Jennings is not traveling with the team to Nike Free Run Seattle because of the knee injury that has shelved the veteran running back since Week 6. Officially listed as doubtful, Jennings' absence comes as no great suprise.

Also for Big Blue, defensive tackle wholesale jerseys shop Cullen Jenkins, cornerback Zack Bowman and pass rusher Mathias Kiwanuka are all questionable for Sunday's showdown with the Seahawks.

After showing tantalizing promise in the preseason, Williams has struggled of late in New York's backfield. The rookie hasn't topped four yards per carry in a game since Week 4 and spit out just 22 yards off Nike Roshe Run 12 attempts in Monday night's loss to the Colts. The Giants NFL Jerseys saw better production from second-year runner Michael Cox and the unkillable Peyton Hillis.

After throwing an outrageous 52 passes in the Indy defeat, new nike nfl jerseys Eli Manning is a candidate to take to the skies again if New York's running cheap sale jerseys game remains NFL Jerseys Store stuck in neutral against Seattle.

Meiqing Xu said...

ray ban sunglasses outlet
coach factory outlet
ralph lauren sale clearance
yeezy boost
timberland boots
tory burch outlet
nike shoes
chi flat iron
coach outlet
new york yankees jerseys
20170316caiyan

Post a Comment